Uncounted Cost of Samaya
Uncounted Cost of Samaya
I wrote, “Uncounted Cost of Samaya” out of necessity. It addresses a crisis of faith and the act of living through, or with, it. While the Judeo-Christian notion of a crisis of faith is the subject of many films and novels, the Western Buddhist equivalent is lacking in any media.
The following poem demonstrates an American Buddhist (Vajrayanist in particular) acknowledging his humanity, amongst other things.
blood on the dorje,
tears in the bell.
loneliness invades my space
with questions I should not
need to answer. and so I
stand with cramped knees
and rearrange the wrathful puja –
new beginnings, same old endings
. . . why’d it have to be that way . . .
incense fills my eyes — the smoke,
I stand too close then walk away
in circles clockwise counter
revolution of the wheel of time,
but won’t rewind the scene;
I remember every stitch of it.
. . . why’d it have to happen . . .
for sanctity more than refuge,
standing yet again before the
multicolored rainbowesque
display of wisdom’s power,
I kiss the tail and face of time
and sit beside my piety
. . . why’d these prayers fail your pleas . . .
i strike the drum for new beginnings,
touch my skull to ground and so
begin repentance turning but there’s
blood on the dorje,
tears in the bell.
Joseph is an FPMT Foundation Member and published poet. A Scientific Glassblower by trade and father of two sons, he resides in the Philadelphia region of the USA where he tries to find balance in an unbalanced world.
